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What Are the Pros and Cons of Growing a Funny Beard?

M.C. Huguelet
M.C. Huguelet

A funny beard may seem like a surefire way to amuse others while expressing oneself. Prior to cultivating hilarious facial hair, however, it is important to note that there are both pros and cons to growing a funny beard. On the positive side, an amusing beard can make others laugh, and can also make the bearded individual memorable. Yet a funny beard also requires a significant amount of effort to maintain, can be physically uncomfortable, may draw unwanted attention, and can even affect one’s eligibility for certain jobs.

For those who enjoy making people laugh, perhaps the best part of a funny beard is its ability to amuse others. In fact, an outrageous beard can act as its own punchline, allowing its wearer to be perceived as funny without ever opening his mouth to tell a joke. It can also provide an excellent conversation starter.

Longer beards should be shampooed and combed to keep them clean.
Longer beards should be shampooed and combed to keep them clean.

On a related note, a funny beard can also function as a kind of trademark that makes its wearer memorable to others. This quality may prove advantageous for those who wish to make themselves stand out in large crowds. It may also be useful for those interviewing or auditioning for a position which requires a demonstrated sense of humor, such as a stand-up comedian.

A humorous beard may cause itching.
A humorous beard may cause itching.

Before beginning to grow an amusing beard, however, it is important to note that this kind of facial hair carries some disadvantages. Many times, funny beards derive their funniness from the fact that they are curled and contorted into outrageous, gravity-defying shapes. Maintenance of these looks usually requires substantial daily grooming time, and may also call for a range of tools and styling products.

Like all beards, a humorous beard can also be physically uncomfortable. It may cause itching, redness, and flaking of the facial skin. These symptoms are generally worse among those who have sensitive skin.

Further, while making people laugh might feel good most of the time, it should be noted that a funny beard can sometimes draw unwanted attention. Like it or not, extreme facial hair can send an invitation to others to stare, comment, chuckle, or even point. Unlike a funny hat or a silly t-shirt, a beard cannot be quickly and easily removed. Thus, even if the wearer does not feel like being the center of attention on a given day, he will likely find it difficult to keep a low profile.

Finally, a funny beard may affect one’s eligibility for certain jobs. Many office jobs as well as positions with a customer service element require employees to maintain a neat appearance. Food service positions may ban all hair which cannot be easily tucked into a hat or hairnet. Regardless of their abilities, those with extreme facial hair may find themselves disqualified from such positions on the basis of their appearance.

Discussion Comments

umbra21

@clintflint - I've got to confess that my favorite beard joke is one where they have a picture of a guy with a really long, thick beard and the caption "excuse me, miss, my eyes are up here."

And it's supposed to be true that women are instinctively more attracted to beards, but I suspect that gets overridden by the fact that it's more of a social norm to be clean shaven.

clintflint

@Fa5t3r - Well, if you are a beard growing individual you presumably have to shave every morning to get rid of the beard you don't want. I have more than one male friend who wishes they could grow a funny beard, but their hair always comes in in patches, so they never bother.

I guess it's a genetic thing though, because there are some people who hardly grow any facial hair and others who can nest a family of pigeons in their beard if they wanted to.

I guess a really funny beard would be the most trouble to maintain though, since it would probably be shaved into a particular shape and that would take forever to get right every day. I'm not sure I have all that much sympathy, however, since I don't think it's all that different from girls having to put on makeup to meet a certain standard. There's far more pressure for them to do that, than for men to sculpt their facial hair.

Fa5t3r

I can't even bring myself to grow out the hair on my head past the point where I have to brush it every day, let alone growing out another section of hair elsewhere. Beards and goatees are definitely not an additional something I'd want to deal with in the morning.

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    • Longer beards should be shampooed and combed to keep them clean.
      By: Maxim Vlasenko
      Longer beards should be shampooed and combed to keep them clean.
    • A humorous beard may cause itching.
      By: StockRocket
      A humorous beard may cause itching.